Not my will …

Life does not according to plan. At all.  If you’re breathing right now you can probably agree.

We all want to end up in a promised land, right? For Christians we are promised eternal life in heaven with our creator.

It’s not a straight shot to the Promised Land though is it? It’s never A to B…

It’s Part A. Section 1 Article 2 …section 1.5… and so on and so on…
Mountains. Valleys. Oceans. Deserts. Car break downs.

It’s filled with giants to face and obstacles along the way.  But, in the adventure God provides the rainbows as a reminder of His promises.  It’s an endurance race and God has given us His spirit to strengthen us to be able to finish this race well. He is the prize forever and ever.

While we are still in this life we endure many things and only by the power of the Holy Spirit Do we overcome them. It’s no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me. If Christ lives in us and nothing is impossible for Him then nothing is impossible for us either because His strength is made perfect in our weakness. We can do all things through Christ who gives us His strength. We can endure to the end.

Now, my life seems to be a series of things that never work out. (I’m sure a lot of people can say that.) But as a Christian we know that all things work together for good to those who love God and are the called according to His purpose.

When you become a Christian you have surrendered your own plans. You no longer have control over your life. You’ve placed your life in the hands of the Creator of everything. You’ve accepted His will and are just enjoying the ride. In the beginning letting go of control is the scariest thing in the whole world, but as you learn to trust Him your grip lessens and lessens because you learn He only wants what is best for us (and you were never in control in the first place. There was only an illusion of control).

It’s in this process that you learn the battle is in your mind and that we should hold every thought captive in obedience to Christ.  Once you learn the game you learn nothing can get you because you can only be affected by what you let get to you.  You can either live life as a negative Nancy and Debbie Downer or you can see things through God’s eyes and grow from adversity.  You can learn instead of being scarred from everything.  Once I learned this my life got so much better.  It’s like opportunities started presenting themselves.  But, this is where you learn how much gratitude can do.  Why would God bless a resentful heart?  But, a grateful heart sees God in EVERYTHING.  He doesn’t miss out on ANYTHING.  And then with that deepens your trust and relationship with Him and it’s just the greatest thing in the whole world.

So, to make a long, metaphorical story short everyone knows I would move to Colorado in the next hour if an opportunity presented itself.  I would live in a dumpster.

“Faithful is He that calleth you” to Colorado

At my current job we have two volunteers with Down’s Syndrome who clean the machines.  I’ve known them for 5 years now.  One of them (who is my future husband 😛 ) has become one of my favorite buddies in the whole world and Tuesdays and Thursdays are rays of sunshine.

Last week his mom (and dad in the same morning) called and told me his PCA (personal care attendant) is moving away and wondering if I would be interested in taking the job.  He was stressed because he really liked this girl and was wondering who would be his new PCA.

All his mom told him was Jesus always takes care of him and he had been asking “When is Jesus coming?” (I ask that almost every day, but that’s another story…)  The next day she thought to ask me about the job.

Y’all don’t understand.  This is the first time in my entire life I didn’t hesitate on an answer.  I didn’t overanalyze anything.  I didn’t say this or that could go wrong or what if this or what if that.  I didn’t question a new job (when I have been waiting for an opportunity to open up at any time).

I just didn’t want to freak the lady out so I said ok… I would think about it, but I’m pretty sure we all knew I would do it.

She didn’t want to tell him until all the paperwork was done.  I called her after I got off and explained my plans to move to Colorado.  I told her everything only to be fair and to give her a chance to say, “That doesn’t work for us”.  I was to meet her the following Wednesday (yesterday as of writing this) to go over paperwork.

She called me yesterday morning to tell me which documents to bring with me (if I was still interested in taking the job).

I was so excited about this.  THIS WAS IT.

At lunch my dad visits me at work to tell me “I almost didn’t tell you this, but I have to tell you this… there’s a job offer for you in Colorado.  Pray about it .”
“You HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME!  I knew something was going to come up!  I was way too excited over this!  You have to be kidding!”
“I know.  I almost didn’t tell you, but I had to.  We’ll see how loyal you are to him now.”

For an hour I prayed and was like “AHHHHH!!!!  TELL ME!!!!!”

And you know what?

If this isn’t evidence of what is for you and God’s timing then I don’t know what is because *just like that* my thought was “It’s not Colorado time.”

Even at the start of my dad telling me my choice was my little buddy, but I also was like “COLORADO!!!!!”

I met his mom yesterday afternoon and filled out all the paperwork and my new part time job is getting to spend time with one of my favorite people.  They told him last night.

He was worried about getting a new PCA and they even considered not getting him one.  His mom told him Jesus always takes care of him.

He came to work this morning and said, “Jesus is in heaven”.
I said, “Yep.  He takes care of you?”
“Yeah”
“And He takes care of me?”
“Yeah…………. new PCA?”
“Yep.  You’re stuck with me now.”

So, they needed a PCA for him and they were stressed over finding someone for him.

I’ve been stressed about any door at all so that provided for me.

I’ve prayed and stressed for I don’t know how long over any door to open up to run through and it ended up being spending the afternoons with my buddy.

This only proves we have no control over anything and God controls everything and puts everything in place at the exact time and moment it is supposed to be there.  We have no control over anything.

What are the chances I would get to work with my favorite guy and what are the chances the exact day I had to fill out the paperwork a Colorado offer would come up and I would say, “Nope.  It’s not time.”

Everyone knows for any other reason I would’ve been on the next plane to Colorado, but God provided this opportunity because it’s not time yet to move.  I could cry because of how good God is to me and He always knows what we need.  He’s always on time.  Never late.  Never early.

I texted his Mom his and my conversation from this morning and her response:
“He is a man of few words.  When we told him last night he got the biggest smile!  His smile did not fade for at least 5 minutes.  We know Jesus is smiling on us, too.  Thanks so much for loving our son.”

I never saw that rainbow coming… ❤