It’s so easy to look around and feel inadequate.  It’s easy to live in a place of privilege and compare your life to your neighbor’s and strive to do better.  It’s easy to compete for the better side of the American Dream.

But, what are we supposed to do as a Christian?

I don’t want the American Dream.  I don’t want to just settle for comfort.

I want what God wants for me, but what is that?

“I AM CRUCIFIED WITH CHRIST: NEVERTHELESS I LIVE; YET NOT I, BUT CHRIST LIVETH IN ME: AND THE LIFE WHICH I NOW LIVE IN THE FLESH I LIVE BY THE FAITH OF THE SON OF GOD, WHO LOVED ME, AND GAVE HIMSELF FOR ME.” – GALATIANS 2:20

We are to die to self.  There is nothing we can do that ever pleases God.  Nothing.  We can never earn our salvation and our best attempt at trying to please Him is like filthy rags if the Holy Spirit has not led us to do so.  It is by grace we are saved through faith.

“BUT, BELOVED, WE ARE PERSUADED BETTER THINGS OF YOU, AND THINGS THAT ACCOMPANY SALVATION, THOUGH WE THUS SPEAK. FOR GOD IS NOT UNRIGHTEOUS TO FORGET YOUR WORK AND LABOUR OF LOVE, WHICH YE HAVE SHEWED TOWARD HIS NAME, IN THAT YE HAVE MINISTERED TO THE SAINTS, AND DO MINISTER. AND WE DESIRE THAT EVERY ONE OF YOU DO SHEW THE SAME DILIGENCE TO THE FULL ASSURANCE OF HOPE UNTO THE END: THAT YE BE NOT SLOTHFUL, BUT FOLLOWERS OF THEM WHO THROUGH FAITH AND PATIENCE INHERIT THE PROMISES.”
– HEBREWS 6:9-12

There’s nothing we could ever do besides surrender that could ever please Him.  He just wants us as we are.

My faith was shaken a few weeks ago and it made me question all kinds of things.

What am I supposed to be doing?
Am I really living the life you want for me?
I don’t feel like I am enough.
I should be doing more.
Is this right?
Am I where you want me?
Where do you want me?
What am I going to do next?
There has to be more. I need to be doing more.

I am thankful for Christian friends to speak truth and hold me accountable.

“It’s ok to struggle as long as you run to God.”

That was so freeing to hear even though I know that.  He already knows our thoughts and our heart.  Nothing can surprise Him.  He wants us to bring HIM our questions and concerns and lay them down.  He wants to comfort us, but to do that we have to admit our problems and say that there is one.  We are secure and can never be plucked from His hand.  Nothing can separate us from the love of God.  We are His children and He loves us so much and wants to help us.  He doesn’t torment us and leave us to die.  He says to cast our cares on Him because He cares for us… His burden is light.  He wants us to be free and to guide us.  He has the answers and is waiting for us to ask.

“MY BRETHREN, COUNT IT ALL JOY WHEN YE FALL INTO DIVERS TEMPTATIONS; KNOWING THIS, THAT THE TRYING OF YOUR FAITH WORKETH PATIENCE. BUT LET PATIENCE HAVE HER PERFECT WORK, THAT YE MAY BE PERFECT AND ENTIRE, WANTING NOTHING.” – JAMES 1:2-4

Why am I never content where I am?  I truly believe I am doing what God has called me to do in this season.  I do not lack anything, yet it is not enough and I want what’s next.  How do I know I am living my purpose and true potential?  What about Paul and Peter and all the apostles?  They didn’t live in the comfort of their own homes and lives crying about what was to come.  They were out there sharing the gospel and being persecuted.

There is no real point to this post except it’s not our job to worry.  As much as I am filled with doubt and uncertainty right now I know my God is faithful.  He has not left me or forgotten about me.  He will teach me what He wants to teach me in the appropriate times.  I do not need to go out looking for He will bring it to me.  He puts thoughts in our minds to spark interest of where we are to go next.  He tugs at our hearts and places desires there.

“What should I be doing?”
“How can I be a good witness?”
“How do I know I’m being a good Christian?”
“How can I help others?”

When the reality is right now I AM THE ONE IN NEED of comfort.  I am the one filled with questions and needs help.  I am the one who feels lost and right now can only focus on spending time with my Father.  I don’t need to worry about this or that right now.  The devil ALWAYS knows when you are most vulnerable and weak and shows up right on time to point out your flaws and all the things you think you are missing.

You can’t help someone who is drowning if you have an anchor tied to your own ankle.

Let Him lead you. Let Him guide you.

The Gospel is simple, but we like to make life a lot more complicated than it should be.

I am not Paul.  I am not Peter.  I am not Moses or Abraham.

But, I am a Child of God who He redeemed from the foundations of the world.  He knew my name before I ever was ever formed in my mother’s womb.  He called me and I am His and He is mine.

He left the 99 to rescue me and I get to spend the rest of this life drawing closer to Him and then eternity in His presence…

It’s not our work.  It’s His.  We are just vessels willing to be used.

We are to go where He leads and where He leads is where you’re supposed to be.

Study His word and show yourself approved and let the Holy Spirit guide you… you do not need to be taught by man.

“AND I, BRETHREN, WHEN I CAME TO YOU, CAME NOT WITH EXCELLENCY OF SPEECH OR OF WISDOM, DECLARING UNTO YOU THE TESTIMONY OF GOD. FOR I DETERMINED NOT TO KNOW ANY THING AMONG YOU, SAVE JESUS CHRIST, AND HIM CRUCIFIED. AND I WAS WITH YOU IN WEAKNESS, AND IN FEAR, AND IN MUCH TREMBLING. AND MY SPEECH AND MY PREACHING WAS NOT WITH ENTICING WORDS OF MAN’S WISDOM, BUT IN DEMONSTRATION OF THE SPIRIT AND OF POWER: THAT YOUR FAITH SHOULD NOT STAND IN THE WISDOM OF MEN, BUT IN THE POWER OF GOD.”
– 1 CORINTHIANS 2:1-5

JESUS ANSWERED AND SAID UNTO THEM, THIS IS THE WORK OF GOD, THAT YE BELIEVE ON HIM WHOM HE HATH SENT. – JOHN 6:29