Why do you give?  Is it to help others or is it to tell others your good deed for the day?  If you do decide to help someone in need do you post a video of the event on social media to puff yourself up?  Do you want to tell others what you did because you’re excited about what God did or to show what you did?

This blog post is going to be contradictory in a way because I wanted to share two stories of two different times I’ve helped people, but mean to do so in the humblest of ways and to make a point.  This isn’t meant to be what I DID, but about listening to the Holy Spirit and being obedient.

“Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.

Therefore, when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: that thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly.

And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.

But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.” – Matthew 6:1-8

Does the Bible say we must give to everyone who asks us for money?  As Christians, who are called to show our faith by our love, does it make us unloving to not help someone in need?  We get condemned for not donating to all charities or even a good cause.

It is important to have discernment when giving because, I think, as human beings we have a deep longing to help others.  Maybe not everyone feels this way, but unless you are an extreme psychopath we all have some sort of compassion.  As a Christian that is our obligation and is not required through a church or government, but ourselves.  

But, what is considered helping?  I am not an expert on this topic and wrestle with “should I help EVERYONE?!” while not having a lot of money to begin with. ‘Giving’ doesn’t just end with money as you can share your time, your clothes, cook meals, your Faith, your home, gifts and talents… whatever you give does not start and stop with monetary donations.  Some people were given the gift of hospitality which to me is amazing. It’s so effortless for them to share their home, invite you to dinner, and make you feel as if you’ve always been part of their family.  And they’re like that with everyone they meet.  It’s truly a remarkable gift to me.

Not everyone is in a financial position to give as much they would like.  We have to take care of our own homes before we can ever help anyone else.  Just think of the rules on an airplane: in the event of an emergency and the bags drop you have to give yourself oxygen before you can help others.  You losing oxygen because you’re trying to help someone else won’t benefit anyone if you are passing out yourself.  

I know there are times, especially now, when we stress about money.  I am not rich by any means, but am blessed to have two jobs. There is a constant worry that they can get taken from me at any time…and I know that doesn’t make much sense.  I should not worry at all if I believe God is my provider.  As a Christian battling the flesh some things are never good enough.  I may not be where I want to be in life, but that doesn’t make me any less blessed.  When you truly don’t lack anything it’s easy to take things for granted.  I remember during a few week period a few months ago I stressed myself out over money so bad and was praying about it that an opportunity came up to give. I didn’t even know the situation and God told me to give money away.  Sometimes, we are to get rid of the very thing we have made an idol.  Could I really afford to give what I gave?  The value is not important and won’t share that detail.  I might be tight on money, but the situation was worse than mine and in the end what did it matter?  We won’t make it out of here alive or take anything with us?  

If you give money should it really matter what the receiver does with it if you gave with a pure, cheerful heart?  “They’re just going to buy alcohol with it.”

One time when I was walking in the city a random woman asked me for a dollar.  I kindly said I could not give any money and kept walking.  I felt horrible after, turned around, and said ‘Come on… We can go to this cafe over here and I’ll buy lunch.’  She declined.

The very first time the Holy Spirit told me to give money to someone was before I was even saved, but searching.  To make a long story short I was walking into a Walmart and planned to give money in my wallet to someone because it wasn’t mine.  I used money to buy coats at the thrift store to donate for my aunt’s church drive.  I was convicted that the unused money wasn’t for me to spend on myself.  Walking into Walmart there was a Salvation Army sitting outside and I decided to give it to a specific person instead of a charity.  I walked into Walmart with no expectations, but with a desire, and shopped for whatever I went there for.  I remember passing the eggs when I saw a woman pushing her grocery basket with one hand and a handicapped, recliner wheelchair with the other.  After I saw her I couldn’t get her off my mind.  I tried finishing my shopping and checking out, but instead kept circling the store and basically stalked this woman in Walmart.  I watched her walk to the register thinking, ‘But, she’s going to think I’m insane?!?’.

My heart was pounding out of my chest. If you are a Christian you understand the “NOW!” nudging of the Holy Spirit.  

I finally approached her.

“Listen, I’ve never done anything like this in my life, but I saw you by the eggs… God put it on my heart to give you this money.  It’s not a lot, but this is for you.  I’ve been a caregiver, too.  Have a blessed day.”

We hugged and I left.  I’ve never seen her since, but think of and pray for her often.  I’ll never forget that as long as I live.

Another thing I will never forget is doing something else I’d ever done in my life.  This happened June 2019 (I know because I still have the picture in my phone.).

I went to Lowe’s one morning to buy plants for my garden.  An old lady pulled up in her car next to mine and kindly asked if I could give her some money for gas so she could get to Mississippi to help a friend.  The thought occurred to me ‘if you are trying to get to Mississippi what are you doing in this parking lot?!’, but didn’t want to judge and old people have a special place in my heart.  I gave her what I had in my wallet and she prayed for and thanked me.

I had a weird feeling, but walked in the store.  I knew I shouldn’t have judged, but watched through the door to find her circling the parking lot.  I realized I had been scammed.  I asked an employee about it and she called security irritated and said she was back harassing customers.  I spoke with the kind security guard who said “don’t give her any of your money” and that she drove to several establishments doing the same thing.  

I lost my mind. I’d never done what I was about to do.

I’d been through life enough in the last few years to finally be sick of people taking advantage of me and this day was not the day.  I’m almost embarrassed to share the rest of the story, but it is what it is.  Had she not “prayed” for me I may have been able to let it go, but she was a liar taking advantage of people and using God to do it.  My dad said, “Vengeance is Mine, saith the Lord”… hinting at me.

Walmart is right down the street from Lowe’s so I hopped in my car and drove there.  I texted my coworker and told her what happened and what I was doing.  I didn’t see her text until later that said “Aimee. No. That’s dangerous.”  My poor coworker.

I circled the parking lot several times and spotted her pulling up to women putting groceries away in their trunks.  I slammed on my brakes, parked in the middle of the street, and jumped out of the car, screaming.

“I thought you were going to Pascagoula?!”

“Well, I am.  But I got lost.”

At this point I looked like the real psychopath yelling at an old lady who needs directions.

“I spoke with security at Lowe’s and found out you drive all over town stealing peoples money!  You’re going to answer to God for this!”

She just sat in the car with her hands in the air … she’d been outed.  I didn’t get my money back but a lady did shout out her license plate number as she was driving away so I could write it down.  I at least saved four innocent people their money that day.  I didn’t want her scamming anybody else.

I carried on going across town to Target where a friend said I could meet her.

I happenstancely went that way.  I was going to meet a friend.  It’s in a strip mall meaning lots of people are there.  As I’m walking in the store I saw her car in front of Ross.  This woman, who was ‘going to Mississippi’ was driving through the parking lot there scamming more people!  I was so upset texted my cop friend about her who told me “Don’t approach her.  Leave her alone.”

“But she’s stealing from people!!”

“I know, but it could be dangerous.  Leave her alone.”

“But!!!”

“I don’t want you getting hurt.”

I left her alone. But I stood in the front of Target with my phone out, waving to her with a smile on my face.  When she spotted me she SPED OFF!!!  That part still makes me laugh, but my hands are still shaking in anger typing out this story.

I have not felt bad about not giving people money since then.

The moral of this story is to use discernment when helping people.  Not everyone has a pure heart and God tells us who to help.

A few weeks ago I was praying again about this Same topic. “I thought we were called to help the homeless and do these things.” A few hours later a friend called hysterically crying because her family took in a homeless person and give them a job. She couldn’t understand why she would be so upset but her spirit didn’t sit right with the situation. She only heard his voice and knew something was amiss with him And felt bad about having to get rid of him. I just sat on the phone while listening to her family praying and having to deal with it. Her dad said well maybe it’s the right thing, but the wrong person. Maybe it wasn’t necessarily about this guy, but about who he could bring around. God will send them the right person to help as they have helped several others who became family before. She didn’t understand what was going on, but I told her God used her to answer my own prayer from a few hours before about using discernment in who to help. We aren’t called to help Everyone, but God sends the people who aren’t meant to be there for His purpose.

I don’t really know the point of this blog post, but when someone pressures you to give them money you can say no.  ‘Freely you give and freely you receive.’ Listen to the Holy Spirit.

God taught me a good lesson about discernment and I always think back to those two stories.

Obedience is greater than sacrifice

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