Something I write about a lot is the fact that I lost someone very important to me in April. It was a true test of my faith because my life was headed in one direction and he was part of it. Nothing seemed to be working out, but the one thing that fit was we were going to live near each other and be a real ‘church’ family. He was going to be healed from his illness. We believed. We prayed. He’s prayed over people who were healed. He’s seen miracles. He’s been in my life since I was 6 years old and God used him to lead me to Christ. I had absolutely no doubt he would be healed.

His healing was not physical in this life and when I tell you my faith was shaken to the core I mean it with the full definition of the term. It took a while to figure out why his death hit me so hard and it is because he was there through all the other trials in my life. He was always there.

He died in April and I would never want him back knowing the glory he is experiencing, but in August I read the devotional shared below that seemed to be written FOR ME. I don’t read this website daily, but the two days in a row I did were spot on for my situation. I would never call him my ‘leader’, but he was someone I knew I could always run to with questions and he never pointed to himself, but always Christ. He was a “regular” man living an extraordinary life because Jesus WAS HIS LIFE.

My life has truly changed since April 17th. I’ve questioned everything, fought unbelief, said things I didn’t think were possible for me to say, have seen miracles and experiences I’d never thought I’d see. So much has happened in the last few months it’s unbelievable. I would have been so excited to tell him all about what is happening and what God has done and I know he would’ve been excited to hear about it all. But, he gets to experience ALL His glory now and not just bits and pieces and I can’t wait to see him again and we’ll dance with Jesus and praise him for eternity together.

It makes me think of the song “Some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers…” by Garth Brooks (YouTube link).

His ways and plans are higher.

My Utmost for His Highest – Oswald Chambers
August 11, 2020
“Elijah went up by a whirlwind into heaven. And Elisha…saw him no more. —2 Kings 2:11-12

It is not wrong for you to depend on your “Elijah” for as long as God gives him to you. But remember that the time will come when he must leave and will no longer be your guide and your leader, because God does not intend for him to stay. Even the thought of that causes you to say, “I cannot continue without my ‘Elijah.’ ” Yet God says you must continue.

Alone at Your “Jordan” (2 Kings 2:14). The Jordan River represents the type of separation where you have no fellowship with anyone else, and where no one else can take your responsibility from you. You now have to put to the test what you learned when you were with your “Elijah.” You have been to the Jordan over and over again with Elijah, but now you are facing it alone. There is no use in saying that you cannot go— the experience is here, and you must go. If you truly want to know whether or not God is the God your faith believes Him to be, then go through your “Jordan” alone.

Alone at Your “Jericho” (2 Kings 2:15). Jericho represents the place where you have seen your “Elijah” do great things. Yet when you come alone to your “Jericho,” you have a strong reluctance to take the initiative and trust in God, wanting, instead, for someone else to take it for you. But if you remain true to what you learned while with your “Elijah,” you will receive a sign, as Elisha did, that God is with you.

Alone at Your “Bethel” (2 Kings 2:23). At your “Bethel” you will find yourself at your wits’ end but at the beginning of God’s wisdom. When you come to your wits’ end and feel inclined to panic— don’t! Stand true to God and He will bring out His truth in a way that will make your life an expression of worship. Put into practice what you learned while with your “Elijah”— use his mantle and pray (see 2 Kings 2:13-14). Make a determination to trust in God, and do not even look for Elijah anymore.

Blogs referencing him/things I’ve learned since April:
Matthew 10: When only God can restore your relationship with your dad.

Thankful I didn’t get what I wanted the most.

Sunflowers always face the sun: “The grass withereth, the flower fadeth, but the word of our God shall stand for ever…”

I had a meltdown over soup and a rental car: “If you think you’ve messed up God’s plan; you, my friend, are not that powerful.”

Mark 11: Sometimes you’re the mountain that needs to be moved

Can you really move forward until you tell someone you can’t be with you love them?

Resist the devil and he will flee…

“Every good and perfect gift comes from above…” after 4 years God gave me a car

From A to Z be thankful for the M…

The Dr. said <1%… but, God…

Let inadequacy and insecurity draw you to wholeness…

‘Lift up your hands and stand upon those feeble knees.’ You are going through this to help someone else…