Faith stands firm during the chaos with your feet planted on solid ground. Faith is willing to be mocked and ridiculed, knowing you may bend but will not break. Jesus warns us that persecution will happen and says to rejoice (Matthew 5:10-12). What do you think would happen to His followers if they killed the Messiah? Is the servant greater than his master? (John 13:16) Faith understands the consequences of taking a stand and preaching the Truth without any doubt because when you hold what is true, nobody can convince you otherwise.

My walk with God has not always been the prettiest. I think it is easy for people to imagine Christianity as boring or God snapping His finger and erasing all of life’s problems. He says to work out your salvation with fear and trembling (Philippians 2:12) for a reason. We were born one way, and when we become born again have to RE-LEARN how to live as we are now living with His spirit convicting us. We are temples of the Holy Spirit and MUST live accordingly. We have to UNDO and UNLEARN all the things we know to be transformed by renewing our minds. He is taking our minds, wringing them out, and washing them with the Word that has been impressed on our hearts. His Word is “quick and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword” and transforms because we want what HE wants as a new creature. It pierces ‘even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart’ (Hebrews 4:12). When scripture says chastening is not pleasant at the time, but will reap righteousness later (Hebrews 12:11)… #thestruggleisreal and He ain’t joking. The first time I read that verse, I laughed out loud. I can testify this is real life because this is Christianity. Christianity is not for the weak, but his strength is made perfect in our weakness.

Surrender: The battle of flesh vs. spirit. 

I am so grateful for the scriptures, for every time I read it am comforted not to be the only one who has been stubborn and fought God (Cue: God telling Moses if he did not want to go, he will kill him and find someone else. Moses: “Okaaaayyyy, I’ll go.”). One of the most comforting things I have ever read was when Jacob literally wrestled with God and walked away with a limp (lest he forgets Who won). 

In his letter to the Romans, Paul writes that he does the things He does not want to do and does not do the things he wants to do… “SAY IT A LITTLE LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!”

While I was praying, reality hit me: yesterday is over. It’s done. You cannot go back and change the past, and you cannot worry about it. We can only move forward, and what happens in the future, God already sees it.

We do not always understand what God is doing in our lives. He knows what will make us pay attention, though, right? Instead of being overwhelmed when things come up, I have learned to say, “Ok, we are here, God. What are you teaching me?”. Instead of focusing on the circumstance, focusing on God is much more profitable. He uses those things to draw us close and teach us.

You are not the same person when you come out of the storm as you went in, as that is what the storm is all about.

He may not always keep us from the fire, for it is there we are made stronger, but He will protect us from getting burned and is with us like in the book of Daniel.

Matthew 6 states that it is not my job to worry for worrying, crying, or having panic attacks does not change a thing, but God changes us. When we beg God to change our circumstances, he sometimes changes our hearts amid chaos instead.

Furthermore, when you choose to surrender and stop all the fighting, God whispers and speaks:

“Now that you will listen and have calmed down, I will show you…”

“We can stay here as long as you want…”

He treats us just like a child in time out.

When I thought I was alone and did not know where to turn, God kept me for Himself. While my life seemed to be spiraling out of control, He was planting His Word in my heart. At the right time, He brings us out of isolation when He knows He has us and sets us free to spread what we have learned like wildfire, for we cannot contain the fire in our hearts.

“FOR I AM NOT ASHAMED OF THE GOSPEL OF CHRIST: FOR IT IS THE POWER OF GOD UNTO SALVATION TO EVERY ONE THAT BELIEVETH; TO THE JEW FIRST, AND ALSO TO THE GREEK. FOR THEREIN IS THE RIGHTEOUSNESS OF GOD REVEALED FROM FAITH TO FAITH: AS IT IS WRITTEN, THE JUST SHALL LIVE BY FAITH.” – ROMANS 1:16-17

When someone plants a seed, it is placed in the dark, buried in the soil. Water and light have to appear for it to grow. But, first, the seed has to split open, and the whole original piece has to be shaken and broken apart. Roots are forming.

In order to grow, it cannot stay in the shell, for a sprout has to burst through. For this to happen, that little seed stays in the dark for a long time. The “fruit” of the process does not happen right away, and just because it is not visible does not mean there aren’t insane things happening underneath. A new creation is springing forth. A new heart is being created, and a serious transformation is taking place. But, it all happens in a secret, dark place where light and water have to get in.

Jesus is the light of the world and the living water. He pours Himself out for us. He wants us. He takes these hearts of stone, the seeds with hard outer shells that nobody can open, and He cracks them. He creates brand new masterpieces and creatures out of something that some would throw away.

It’s such a hard thing to feel buried, but when the roots have taken and the sprout bursts through the soil, there’s nothing except to shout the glory of God and how good He is. His new creation has been made.

But, what about those people we shout our excitement to, and it bounces off like a brick wall?
We are supposed to wipe the dust from our feet and move on. Do not cast your pearls before swine.
It’s much easier said than done because we know the road ahead for them as Christians. We see the destruction that we were rescued from. It is not our work, but His. We can only share.

Free will. We were all given a measure of faith. It can be discouraging when we pray for someone’s eyes to open and heart to soften, but there is no reception at all. You can plead with them and tell them all the goodness of Christ and this joy and the new life you have, but if they choose to be blind, then let them be.

I believe in miracles. I do.

I’ve seen them. I’ve read the parables of the mustard seed and the prodigal son. He left the 99 for me. I am the sheep that went astray, and He came to get me. I’ve read every account about the thief on the cross and have realized we are all that guy.  The gift of salvation is for anyone who believes and calls upon the name of Jesus no matter where they are or where they have been.

I’ve read the gospels and had sighs of relief in how you don’t have to be perfect. Grace is a gift. Jesus ate with the sinners, the poor, the broken, and the lost. He didn’t eat with the Pharisees and hypocrites. He healed the sick. He called people where they were.

God doesn’t want your perfect or best.

He wants your mess.  He wants your ashes.  He wants you as you are.
“Come to Me all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest…”

When you can’t take another step, He wants you.

When you have nothing to give, He wants to give you everything.  He wants YOU.  He loves YOU.
“Now when I passed by thee, and looked upon thee, behold, thy time was the time of love; and I spread my skirt over thee, and covered thy nakedness: yea, I sware unto thee, and entered into a covenant with thee, saith the Lord God, and thou becamest mine.” – Ezekiel 16:8

When you can’t find the words to say and all you have is a broken heart or a bucket of tears…. He wants you.

He knows the number of hairs on your head, and knows what you need before you ask.  He cares about you and wants a relationship with you.

He wants you just as you are.

There is nothing that can shake Him or surprise Him, for you were His before the foundation of the world.

“FOR I AM PERSUADED, THAT NEITHER DEATH, NOR LIFE, NOR ANGELS, NOR PRINCIPALITIES, NOR POWERS, NOR THINGS PRESENT, NOR THINGS TO COME, [39] NOR HEIGHT, NOR DEPTH, NOR ANY OTHER CREATURE, SHALL BE ABLE TO SEPARATE US FROM THE LOVE OF GOD, WHICH IS IN CHRIST JESUS OUR LORD.” – ROMANS 8:38-39

“Known” – Tauren Wells YouTube Link

“It’s so unusual it’s frightening.
You see right through the mess inside me and you call me out to pull me in.
You tell me I can start again and I don’t need to keep on hiding.

It’s so like You to keep pursuing…
It’s so like me to go astray.
But You guard my heart with Your truth…
A kind of love that’s bullet proof and I surrender to Your kindness.

I’m fully known and loved by You.
You won’t let go no matter what I do.
And it’s not one or the other:
It’s hard truth and ridiculous grace to be known …fully known and loved by You

I’m fully known and loved by You…”