Let go of fear and study your butt off.

No. For real.

I wanted to keep this post private due to the uncertainty of how this experiment will go. However, I cannot be afraid of failure. This blog is a Christian blog, and as a Christian, it would be superstitious to think if I avoid talking about something publicly, it may not happen or not work out. Alternatively, I do not want to come back and say I failed. I’ve gone back and forth on this because, on the one hand, it’s living my life and not telling everyone all of my business every five seconds and learning to keep things to myself. On the other hand, this is a journey. I don’t have a large audience and am talking to myself here, which leads to not sharing this fear of failure and not wanting to confront that.

SPIT IT OUT

The plan: Obtain a Class A commercial learner’s permit, attend driving school, train with Ryan, do not crash truck, get hired by the company

I leave for trucking school tomorrow. It’s an experiment of experiments. Ryan and I have had a long-distance relationship since the beginning, and it’s all I’ve known. God used it for good and a purpose, and since dating, we have half-jokingly discussed the idea of team driving. With the pandemic fiasco, I became increasingly aware of the thought of losing my job, my only source of income, which led down the rabbit hole of “how will I ever get ahead,” which prayerfully led us here.

I currently have part-time jobs for the flexibility of our long-distance relationship, which was a massive adjustment for me. I learned a lot through this, including how to rely on someone financially. This did not come easy, and there were a few arguments (on my end) while learning this new life now made for two people and how to submit and depend on someone. After we were married, we tested our theory, and I went on the road with Ryan in the semi-truck for time together and to see if I’d even like it. “Can we do this?”

I had an imaginary goal in mind to get everything done by August. Without realizing it at the time, I will be starting school the week before August. If nothing else comes of this, I am so proud of myself for trying something new and foreign. I leaped over my comfort zone, motivated by desperation and hope, with nothing to lose.

PSA: If anyone studying for the CDL comes across this blog by some weird chance, I highly recommend looking up “Driving Academy Jonathan Air Brakes Live Class” and “Driving Academy Jonathan How to pass air brakes test” on YouTube. He teaches and explains air brakes SO WELL as a visual learner with no concept of anything understood and passed. You’re welcome.

YouTube Links:
How to pass air brakes – Part 1

Air Brakes Explained – Driving Academy Part 2
Earning a commercial driver’s license is NOT AN EASY FEAT, and after initially getting the material to study for the permit gained so much respect for truck drivers. As someone who has no idea what a radiator is, not only do I need to know and locate it, I need to do a pre-trip for the driving test and name every single piece of the 18-wheeler front to back and top to bottom. (Yay!!)

I chose to get my permit before going to school for many reasons and many benefits. One reason is I wanted to avoid the pressure of studying and learning new things for a written test in a few days in a new environment. I did it within my timeframe with less stress at home (as if there is any…). “Air brakes”. If you know, you know. One of the advantages and blessings of this was having a truck driver husband. As a visual learner with no car knowledge, being able to ask first-hand questions and see the inside of the truck and what things are in person and being married to a car guy who could answer ALL of my questions rapidly, detailedly was a significant advantage. The plan is that while I am in school, Ryan will take a one-day training course, and after I pass the driving test, I will train with him for six weeks. After that, we can hit the road as husband and wife team drivers.

Nothing screams waiting for an opportunity and “I’ll do anything,” like growing up avoiding car knowledge to end up driving an 18-wheeler. Is this how I envisioned my life when I prayed to travel with my future husband? No. But, God has a sense of humor, and I’m here for it. I never thought the job I’d even consider when praying to travel with my husband would be living in a semi-truck. “Funny the way it is”…

I am thankful for the opportunity and excited and hopeful to see where this leads. I am nervous and am about to start packing to head for Jackson. So many changes have happened in my life, and for someone who waited years for change and who also does not like change, it has happened rapidly.

With plans of taking the permit test I built the DIY shelf ladder to prove I could do new, hard things. I used the anxiety of the test to get it done so quickly, but it was for a multitude of reasons. We are usually our biggest critics and roadblocks in life. We can get trapped in the prison cell of our minds if we let it.

“Let’s build something together”