It is a slippery slope to spiritual apathy.In my last post, I mentioned one of my best friends losing her new husband and the toll it took on me.

Truth bomb: Had my spiritual life been active, it may not have had the same effect on me. Maybe if I had been in the word and trusted God, I would not have felt such betrayal and loss for my friend.

Add to this the current American politics nightmare, mentally resulting in a trapped trembling cat hissing in the corner (cue the remix: they’re eating the cats, they’re eating the dogs … if you know, you know. Please know.). Look, this is the first time I have truly gotten into politics. Partly because I married Mel Gibson’s character in the movie ‘The Patriot’, and partly because I thought that, as a Christian, God is in control of it all, and if I voted, it would go against His authority. However, are we in the mess we are in because the majority of Christians also looked the other way like I did/do? True, this is not our final home, and God IS the final authority, but I think Christians SHOULD speak up and stand up in politics as we still have to live here and would like the freedom of religion to do so! In the end times, right will be called wrong, and wrong will be called right! Isn’t that the truth!  Everything is so backward!

I do not know the correct answer to voting, but I only state my thoughts. We are in a challenging situation as a country. It is so important to speak up and do what we can for the country’s betterment. There would have to be an entirely different post on this topic. To vote or not to vote goes back and forth because, yes, it’s a rigged system and a game the “peasants” like ourselves will never win. However, that is just it. Listening to the current school system, government, or news media, we would never know that this country is supposed to be ruled by the peasants by chosen representatives. However, instead, those representatives are greedy liars where ‘the rules are for thee and not for me’.  We have become the most ignorant nation, and we can only blame ourselves for it.

To continue this morale-boosting post, I made the mistake of listening to the debate on September 10. Ryan was sleeping and told me he was not going to listen (he wisely listens to the Bible instead). However, it occupied me while I drove and, in the end, only made me extremely agitated. It was a biased debate setup, and one of the running candidates did not have to answer any questions, and the questions they did answer were not answered but irrelevant talking points.

I became extremely anxious, realizing this could be it as America. If a particular party wins, this country will be over as we know it, and nobody seems to care as long as they have the freedom to slaughter the unborn and steal everyone’s hard-earned money to give it to people who do not even legally live here. What are we doing in this truck? What matters?

I talked to Ryan for a while about it, and he said that’s why he does not listen to politics anymore but listens to the Bible.  I said, “Well, that is what I used to do,” but I reminded him that he gave me a bad time about it! He said, “Yeah, but I didn’t know it would affect you that way! ” Hilarious.

I DID KNOW why I refused to listen to certain things, but I wanted to be informed. Politics is an almost compulsive rabbit hole where you cannot turn it off once you start! More accurately, it could best described as a train wreck, especially with the streaming services with internet and time to listen for hours and hours in this truck!

While my mind spiraled out of control with world events and I worried about what would happen in our personal lives, my wonderful, God-fearing husband opened the conversation by saying he’d been listening to Corinthians.

“It says when a woman gets married, she focuses on her husband, not God.”

I replied that’s true. It is very factual with the natural order of things. A woman wants to please her husband, and I’dnoticed that about myself. For the first time, I genuinely want to be feminine. That sounds odd, as I’m a girl and always have been.  I do not know if it’s being in the truck, but I want to dress up and wear makeup.  I have a better job that allows me not to pinch every penny earned, opening the door for buying products to help.  I lost my mind and wanted to buy a hair dryer brush to help my hair in the truck! Is this normal girl behavior? Probably. For me, it is new and I was always so thrifty and trying not to be “worldly” that it makes me check myself for turning into a full vanity project!  I want to be girlier, and it may just be the truck and trying my best not to ‘let myself go’ and get a full trucker body. ha

Anyway, I’d already been thinking of what Ryan said when he said it.  Sounds like the Holy Spirit.  Since we cannot hide from God, and I knew He already knew my struggles, I started weeping and confessed why I went astray. Now, I had already not been spending time with God when my friend’s husband died, but that pushed me over the edge.  I lost trust in the One who saved me and gave me a brand new one. Nothing is guaranteed.  I was unsure about the future and what would happen, and the one controlling the universe let my best friend’s life fall apart. It was a sobering event. Life is not fair, and we are not in control of it. Ryan listened but was concerned.  I said, God already knows my heart, and I have tolet it out to move forward. It was not pretty.

The next day, while driving, I drowned myself in the Word. I listened to sermons and less Michael Buble. It has been this way for the last few days, and it has helped me so much. Imagine that. Less of the world and more God brings peace.

I am so thankful for my husband. He is my answered prayer and keeps Christ at the center of our lives and relationship.  

I’ll try to make my next post lighter with more truck updates. I started a new food page on Instagram as if I don’t spend enough time there and we met a famous owl!

https://www.instagram.com/the_other_aimee/